Source: Ruth A. Peters, Ph.D.

The first day of school is quickly approaching, and kids are anticipating that event with mixed anticipation and apprehension. Old pros, although understanding the routine and structure of the day, still experience a bit of the first-day jitters as they wonder who will be in their classes and how they will fit in socially during the school year.

Kindergarten
How to make this an easier, more fun transition for your little one? Well, attention to a few issues and some major empathy on your part may do the trick. Usually your child’s concerns fall into two categories — getting through the day in one piece (schedules, how the day will proceed) and emotional fears. Let’s begin with the basics:

Getting the lay of the land:

Where’s the bathroom and when can I use it? Good question, and make sure your little one knows exactly were the bathrooms are and what the teacher policy is about when and how to use the bathroom. Discuss this with the teacher and make sure you are happy with her policy! 

What if I don’t make it to the bathroom and have an accident? It’s quite common for teachers to request an extra set of underwear and pants, packed in a large zip-locked plastic bag just for this occasion. Tell your child that this is quite commonplace, and to just alert the teacher to their situation and a clean change of clothes will do the trick. No one else has to know about it, and therefore this is nothing to be concerned about.

What if I get hungry? Will they feed me?  Explain about snack and lunch time, how your youngster will probably have the option of bringing both or the school will provide. Discuss how snack will occur mid-morning and lunch an hour or so later in the day. Ask your son or daughter what they would like for you to pack, and let them consider making their own snacks and lunches either the night before or early in the morning.

Do I have to take a nap? Discuss this with your child teacher - and explain it to your child. By kindergarten, teachers realize that most kids won’t fall asleep (although some are out for the count within a few seconds of their heads hitting the cots!), but benefit from 45 minutes or so of rest and relaxation. Some teachers quietly read a book while others play soothing music.

What happens first? Then what do we do? It’s a good idea to call the school and ask for a daily schedule of activities to review with your child.

Emotional issues:

What if the other kids don’t like me? Ugh, the dreaded fear of many children. Empathize with your child, telling her that most kids have a little worry about this, but are pleasantly surprised at how nice and friendly the children are. Remind her that all of her fellow students will be new to the situation and needing to make friends. Explain that she’ll be placed, most likely, at a table with a few other kids and that she’ll have a chance to quickly get to know them. Breaks is also a great place to make friends, as is lunch. You may want to role-play some “small talk” with your child, especially if she is on the shy side. Rehearse with dolls or stuffed animals before the school year begins. Try scripts like, “Hi, my name is Megan, what’s yours?” That’s sure to get a positive response as well as being a good conversation starter. Explain to your child how others are probably feeling just as nervous or uncertain, and will love being invited to sit with, share activities or play with your child.

What if you don’t pick me up on time? That’s a common fear of little ones, and something that is usually under your control. Please remind them over and over that even if your a lit bit late you will come and pick them up at the end of the day.

What if the teacher doesn’t like me? Tell your child that teachers choose to work with little ones because they love children and are usually warm, funny and understanding people. Emphasize how your child can trust the teacher and go to him or her with any concerns.

What if I’m the dumbest kid in the class? This is a good entrée to getting out the crayons, pencils and scissors and reviewing with your little one some of the skills that will be needed in class. Review the colors, shapes and the alphabet letters that she knows. Practice cutting, coloring and copying — but don’t overdo it. Praise her effort (regardless of the final product) and let her know that she’s right on target for the beginning of the school year. Emphasize that raising her hand to answer questions (and not calling out the answers), sitting quietly on the circle line and staying in her seat are responsibilities and skills that will need to be finely honed.

And don’t forget the excitement of shopping for the lunchbox, book bag and school clothes. Many kids love to wear a new outfit the first day, but don’t be surprised if your child decides on something that he wore at preschool. It may be comforting to take a bit of the old with him as he enters into the new!

Finally, if possible, visit the school beforehand. Try playing on the playground and looking into the classroom windows, or take a tour if it's available. Review the floor plan of the building, at least the part between arrival at school and finding her classroom. Discuss how you’ll handle that the first few days of school. If you can, arrange for a short meeting with the teacher and a quick look at the classroom. Be prepared for a bit of clinginess the first week or so. Then, on the first day of school, hand the child over to the teacher (she’s the expert on this) and try to have a good day!

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